For so many years, I was stuck in a cycle of chronic anxiety and hypervigilance. I was always bracing for the next threat, scanning my surroundings and preparing for the worst. It was exhausting. While everyone else seemed to move through life with ease, I was the one constantly on guard, planning every little thing to avoid any potential danger.
I envied the way others could enjoy the present moment, and I grew resentful that I couldn't. Resentful that it had become my role to be the "responsible" one, the "problem solver," the "protector". My mind was consumed with 'what ifs,' always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I thought if I could just plan enough and anticipate enough, I could avoid the worst. But that hypervigilant mode, which once protected me, became a prison.
And then, something shifted.
I realised that my constant planning wasn't actually keeping me any safer. In fact, it was robbing me of the safety I desperately needed—because no matter how much I prepared, I never felt at ease.
One day, I asked myself: What if I trusted myself? What if I believed that I was already prepared for whatever might comemy way? What would it be like to trust in my ability to solve, deal with and survive anything that may come up? For isn't it true I had already done that time and time again in the past? Hadn't I already proven myself? Proven that I could trust myself?
I started to let go of the need to plan everything down to the last detail because I understood something fundamental: I was capable. I was resilient. I had faced challenges before, and I had always found a way through.
I didn't need to prepare, I WAS PREPARED.
Slowly, the hypervigilance subsided. I didn't need to anticipate every single thing anymore because I trusted that whatever came, I could handle it.
To my fellow hyper-vigilant souls—this is for you. I know how exhausting it is to feel like you're constantly bracing for impact. But the truth is, you are prepared. You've solved every challenge you've faced up until now, and you'll do it again when the time comes.
Meeting your need for safety isn't about over-preparing. It's about trusting yourself—trusting that you are equipped with the strength, wisdom, and resilience to face whatever life throws your way.
So next time that anxiety creeps in, remind yourself: I am prepared. You've always risen to the challenge before, and you will again.
Comments